I got 99 problems... and I'm trying to mask each one with a layer of this sandwich. And I think I'm like 96 layers short.
Seriously though. Yesterday, I confessed to my new roommate that I've been pilfering his peanut butter, so the next jar was on me. His response? "That's ok, I'm post-food. I'm doing Soylent now." Like WTF? This, coming from the guy who makes his own kimchi. I know he's probly not serious about doing it longterm, but you literally couldn't pay me to not eat, and enjoy food. Sometimes, that's all I have.
"But what if it was cheap, fast, and you never had to worry about nutrition again?"
"Well, I can tell you, nutrition is barely in the top 5 reasons of why I cook food."
"Well what if you knew you could end world hunger, but it only worked if everyone was on Soylent?"
"Well. Well... well, I guess I'd probably be one of those assholes with a front lawn farm, and trading butter on the black market."
